Choosing a headstone is one of those tasks that can feel both practical and deeply personal at the same time. In the early days after a death, families are often focused on immediate funeral planning: the service, the paperwork, the travel, the meals, the people to notify. The headstone conversation sometimes arrives later—quietly—when the cemetery calls, when a temporary marker starts to feel too temporary, or when you realize you want a place that looks like love made visible.
Even now, families are balancing more options than ever. In the U.S., cremation has become the majority choice, which means many people are making decisions about a marker and a memorial even when there isn’t a traditional casket burial. According to the National Funeral Directors Association, the U.S. cremation rate is projected to reach 63.4% in 2025, and the Cremation Association of North America reports similar trends. For many families, that means the memorial question becomes two questions: what kind of permanent marker fits the cemetery’s rules, and what kind of container or keepsake fits your home and your heart.
This guide walks through the most popular headstone styles today—flat markers, slant markers, uprights, and benches—with “photo-style” descriptions you can picture even without images. Along the way, you’ll see practical pros and cons, maintenance notes, and real-world cost considerations, plus a few gentle connections to cremation choices like cremation urns, cremation urns for ashes, and what it means to keep someone close.
Before you fall in love with a style, check the cemetery rules
Here is the most important thing families wish they’d known earlier: a cemetery can limit what you’re allowed to install. Some sections require flat markers for easier mowing. Some require specific materials (often granite or bronze). Some restrict height, thickness, color, or even the finish. And many cemeteries have setting requirements, foundation specifications, or installation fees that can change your budget more than the stone itself.
If you’re in the early stages, you don’t have to guess. The Monument Builders of North America’s consumer site explains that memorial costs vary widely based on material, design, installation, and cemetery regulations, and it encourages families to clarify requirements upfront before purchasing. You can start with their overview at Find a Monument Builder, and their checklist-style buying guide at Buying Guide. Even if you don’t use their network, their framing is helpful: cemetery rules and installation details aren’t “extras”—they’re part of the real price and timeline.
From there, it becomes easier to choose a style you love without getting surprised later.
Flat markers: simple, modern, and cemetery-friendly
If you picture a flat grave marker, imagine a clean rectangle set flush with the ground or slightly beveled above it. In a photo, it often looks like a polished slab you’d walk past—subtle, tidy, and easy to maintain. Flat markers are popular because they tend to fit the broadest range of cemetery rules and work well in sections where mowing equipment needs a clear path.
The biggest advantage is restraint. A flat marker can feel calm and contemporary, especially when paired with simple lettering and one meaningful symbol. They are also often easier to clean because you can reach the surface without ladders or climbing. If your family prefers quiet remembrance over visual prominence, this style can feel like the right “volume.”
The trade-off is visibility. Flat markers can be harder to spot from a distance and harder to read if the light is harsh or the grass grows around the edges. Families sometimes address this by choosing a slightly raised bevel marker, adding darker paint fill to lettering (where allowed), or selecting a contrasting finish so the name stays legible.
Cost-wise, flat markers are often the entry point for permanent memorialization, but materials matter. Dignity Memorial’s consumer guide notes that a simple gray granite flush marker can cost about $500, while bronze flush memorials or companion granite markers can run higher depending on size and customization. You can see their examples and ranges at Dignity Memorial. As you compare, remember that installation and foundation requirements can add to the total.
If you want more context about materials and how markers age over time, Funeral.com’s guide Types of Headstones and Grave Markers: Materials, Styles, and How They Age is a practical companion—especially if you’re deciding between granite and bronze, or wondering what weather will do over ten or twenty years.
Slant markers: the “readable compromise”
A slant marker is exactly what it sounds like: a thick stone with a gently inclined face, like a book propped open just enough to read. In a photo, it often looks like a low, solid presence—more visible than a flat marker, less imposing than a full upright monument. Many families like slants because they strike a balance between legibility and simplicity.
The most common reason people choose a slant is readability. Because the face angles toward you, names and dates are easier to see at standing height, and the surface is less likely to collect standing water. Slants can also offer more space for artwork, a short epitaph, or a small faith symbol without feeling crowded.
The trade-off is that not every cemetery allows slants, and slants may require a base or a foundation depending on the design and local frost conditions. Maintenance is usually straightforward, but slants can show grass clippings or soil splash more easily than a flat marker, simply because the face is angled toward the lawn.
For a broad “typical” cost reference, Rock of Ages—an established memorial brand—shares a range that places slant markers with a base in the neighborhood of $2,000 to $4,000 on average, with variation based on materials and personalization. Their breakdown is here: Rock of Ages. Treat this as a starting point rather than a quote; local setting fees and cemetery requirements can shift numbers significantly.
Upright headstones: traditional presence and room to tell a story
When most people say “headstone,” they mean an upright monument: a vertical tablet, often set on a base, standing at the head of a grave. In a photo, it’s the style you see in older cemetery sections—clearly readable from a distance, with space for inscriptions, symbols, and family details.
The biggest advantage of an upright headstone is presence. It’s easier for relatives to find, easier to read, and offers the most room for personalization—an epitaph, a Scripture verse, a carving, a military emblem, even a short list of family names for companion or family stones. Uprights can be especially meaningful for families who want the memorial to feel like a “place,” not just a marker.
The trade-offs tend to be cost and regulation. Uprights require more material and more labor, and they often have the strictest cemetery rules for height, width, thickness, and foundation. They can also require more maintenance over time because there are more surfaces, edges, and joints where dirt and biological growth can gather.
As a general range, Rock of Ages notes that upright headstones often fall around $2,500 to $6,000 on average, again depending on size, material, and customization. You can review that context at Rock of Ages. Dignity Memorial also discusses upright monuments and how added personalization affects cost at Dignity Memorial.
If your family is also choosing what to say on the stone, it can help to read examples before you commit. Funeral.com has several gentle, practical guides that families often use side-by-side with the monument decision: Beautiful Words for Headstones, Headstone Epitaph Ideas, Headstone Quotes and Sayings, and Short, Beautiful Epitaphs.
Bench memorials: a place to sit with your grief
Bench memorials have become increasingly popular in memorial gardens and sections designed for reflection. In a photo, a memorial bench may look like a simple stone seat with a plaque, or a full granite bench with carved names and a dedication line. Families often choose benches when they want the memorial to function as a place of rest, conversation, or prayer—a place where grief can have a physical posture.
The advantage of a bench is emotional as much as aesthetic. It creates a destination. It invites grandchildren to sit. It gives someone visiting alone a place to pause. In cemeteries that allow benches, they can be a beautiful way to honor a person who loved hospitality, gardening, parks, or simply listening.
The trade-offs are space, rules, and cost. Not every cemetery allows bench memorials, and those that do often have specific placement requirements. Bench designs can also be more expensive due to the amount of material and the complexity of the piece. Maintenance is usually manageable, but benches can collect debris and may need seasonal cleaning, especially under trees.
Because bench pricing varies widely by design, the best “cost move” is to confirm whether your cemetery allows benches and whether they require a specific vendor or foundation type. The Monument Builders of North America checklist at Buying Guide is useful here because it nudges you to get the rules and fees in writing before you design something you can’t install.
Modern vs traditional design: the details that change the feel
Two headstones can be the same style and still feel completely different. The difference is often in the details: the font, the finish, the border, and the symbol choices. Modern designs tend to favor clean lines, minimal wording, and high-contrast legibility. Traditional designs often include more ornamentation, family titles, or familiar religious imagery.
If you’re unsure where your family lands, it may help to start with symbols rather than style. A small carving can communicate faith, vocation, or personality in a way that feels more “them” than any font. Funeral.com’s guide Headstone Symbols and Icons: Common Images and What They Mean can help you choose imagery that feels sincere and clear rather than generic.
When cremation is chosen, you may still need a marker
Families sometimes assume cremation means “no headstone,” but that’s not always the case. If ashes are buried in a cemetery plot, placed in a columbarium niche, or interred in a family grave, the cemetery will often require some form of marker. Even when ashes are kept at home, many families still want a public place of remembrance—especially for relatives who are comforted by visiting a cemetery.
If cremation is part of your plan, you may also be weighing memorial choices at home: cremation urns for ashes for a central space, small cremation urns or keepsake urns for siblings and adult children, or cremation jewelry for someone who needs a private, portable connection. Funeral.com’s collections can help you browse gently: cremation urns for ashes, small cremation urns, keepsake urns, cremation jewelry, and cremation necklaces.
If you’re considering keeping ashes at home, Funeral.com’s guide keeping ashes at home covers the practical realities—placement, safety, and how to navigate different comfort levels within the household. If you’re exploring water burial or a water-based ceremony, water burial guidance can help you understand how ceremonies typically work and what families often keep afterward. And if cost is part of your decision, Funeral.com’s breakdown of how much does cremation cost can help you plan with fewer surprises.
Pet headstones and pet urns: a growing part of cemetery and home memorials
Pet memorialization has expanded dramatically in recent years, and many cemeteries now have pet sections or allow pet markers in designated areas. Families who choose cremation for a pet often want a memorial that feels just as thoughtful as any other: a small marker in a pet cemetery, a garden stone at home, or a dedicated shelf indoors.
If your family is exploring pet cremation, Funeral.com’s collections are designed to make those decisions feel manageable and meaningful: pet cremation urns, pet figurine cremation urns, and pet urns for ashes in keepsake styles for families who want to share a small portion or keep a discreet tribute.
Cost considerations that families underestimate
Families often budget for the stone and forget the “surrounding costs” that make installation possible: foundation requirements, setting fees, cemetery permits, and the timing restrictions some cemeteries enforce (for example, limiting installation seasons in climates with frost). This is why it helps to talk to the cemetery early and get policies in writing.
It also helps to understand what is and isn’t included in funeral home pricing. The Federal Trade Commission explains how to compare funeral home costs and why itemization matters in its Funeral Costs and Pricing Checklist. While headstones are often purchased separately from the funeral home, the same principle applies: ask for itemized quotes so you can see what you’re paying for, and where you still need information from the cemetery.
Choosing the “right” headstone is really about choosing what lasts
In the end, the most popular headstone styles are popular for a reason: they work. Flat markers fit many cemeteries and keep maintenance simple. Slants improve readability without feeling towering. Uprights create a visible place of remembrance and allow the most personalization. Benches make space for presence, not just visitation.
