Sometimes grief arrives in the most ordinary place: the bottom drawer of a dresser, a small velvet box, a brooch wrapped in tissue paper that nobody has opened in decades. If you’ve ever found a piece of Victorian hair jewelry—an oval locket with a carefully placed curl behind glass, a braided bracelet that looks like corded silk, a ring whose “stone” is actually a tiny woven panel—you already understand why this tradition has never fully disappeared. Hair is personal in a way that photos and paperwork can’t quite replicate. It’s the part of us that can be held, kept, and recognized, even when the person is gone.
In the Victorian era, hairwork jewelry offered a physical answer to a very human question: how do you keep someone close when your life has been split into “before” and “after”? Today, families ask the same question—sometimes through heirloom hair jewelry, and sometimes through modern memorial options like cremation jewelry, cremation necklaces, or a set of keepsake urns that allows multiple people to share remembrance. The materials have changed, the etiquette has changed, and the language around grief has softened in many places, but the core impulse is familiar: love wants somewhere to land.
Why Hair Became a Victorian Keepsake (And Why It Still Resonates)
To modern eyes, hair jewelry can look mysterious or even unsettling—until you remember what it offered in its own time. Hair doesn’t decompose the way soft tissue does, and it can be braided, woven, and preserved. The Smithsonian Libraries and Archives notes that during the Victorian era, jewelry made from a loved one’s hair was a way of literally keeping the person with you, with hair fashioned into wearable designs like brooches, bracelets, earrings, and rings. That “literal closeness” mattered even more in a world where photography was still developing and death was a more visible part of daily life.
It also mattered because Victorian hairwork sat at the intersection of public ritual and private memory. Some pieces were unmistakably mourning jewelry: black enamel, funerary motifs, inscriptions with birth and death dates, and carefully composed hair under glass. Others were love tokens made from the hair of living friends, children, or partners. The Metropolitan Museum of Art describes a Tiffany & Co. mourning brooch from 1868 featuring plaited hair beneath a crystal face, engraved with a name and dates, while also noting that hair jewelry was not always about mourning—locks of hair were exchanged as tokens of affection, too.
That dual meaning is one reason the tradition feels surprisingly “modern.” We still keep baby curls, tuck pet fur into envelopes, save letters, press flowers, and store small relics that only make sense to us. Victorian hair jewelry simply took that instinct and made it wearable—an everyday object that said, quietly, “I remember.”
How Victorian Hairwork Was Made: Braids, Palettes, and Glass-Front Lockets
Victorian hair jewelry wasn’t one technique; it was a category of crafts. Some pieces used hair almost like thread, braided into ropes and chains for bracelets and watch fobs. Others created “palette work,” where hair was arranged in decorative patterns behind glass—often with initials, symbols, or miniature landscapes. If you’re holding an antique piece now, you may see hair laid in arcs like brushstrokes, or woven into tight patterns that resemble textile work rather than something from a body.
Hairwork could be homemade, professionally made, or somewhere in between. A Cooper Hewitt essay on hairwork explains that hair jewelry expanded in the nineteenth century as part of mourning customs, and it also describes a very modern-sounding anxiety: trust. Customers sometimes mailed hair to tradesmen and worried it wouldn’t be returned; the article notes that some tradesmen returned pre-made pieces containing anonymous hair, and even replaced human hair with sturdier horsehair. In response, instructional books and articles taught women how to make hairwork themselves, reframing it as a domestic art.
One of the most cited examples is Mark Campbell’s 1867 “Self-Instructor in the Art of Hair Work,” now freely available online through Project Gutenberg. Whether you read it as a craft manual, a historical artifact, or both, it makes something clear: hairwork wasn’t a novelty to its makers. It was skilled, technical work—part jewelry-making, part textile craft, part emotional practice.
Symbols and Inscriptions: What Victorian Hair Jewelry Was “Saying”
Victorian mourning culture had a visual language, and hair jewelry often spoke it. Even without knowing the family, you can sometimes read the tone of a piece by its details: the heaviness of black enamel, the presence of an urn motif (a classic symbol of mourning long before it became a practical container), a weeping willow, a small cross, a pearl border, or a name and date inscription that anchors the object to one person’s life.
In museum collections, you’ll see hair used alongside gold, glass, and enamel—materials that can protect the hair while framing it as precious. The Met’s collection includes mid-19th-century mourning jewelry made with gold, glass, and hair, cataloged as an object that stands on its materials and craft as much as its sentiment.
But it’s worth repeating: hair jewelry was not always a death story. Sometimes it was a relationship story. It might mark a child’s growth, a friendship, a long-distance courtship, or a family bond. When you approach an antique piece, you’re not only asking “Is it mourning jewelry?” You’re asking “What kind of closeness did this object protect?”
How to Identify Authentic Victorian Hair Jewelry (Without Turning It Into a High-Stakes Mystery)
If you’re trying to identify an old piece, the goal doesn’t have to be “appraise it like a dealer.” For most families, the goal is simpler: understand what you have, avoid damaging it, and make choices that feel respectful. Authenticity can be complicated, but there are a few gentle, practical cues that help you evaluate a piece without panic.
- Construction and sealing: Many Victorian pieces place hair behind glass or crystal. Look for a clean, intentional compartment rather than hair glued onto the surface.
- Wear patterns that match age: Hinges, clasps, and pin stems often show consistent wear. A piece that looks “new” in the mechanisms but “old” in the front may have been rebuilt or altered.
- Materials consistent with the era: Gold-filled and gold settings, black enamel, and seed pearls are common in mourning styles. Jet and vulcanite appear in broader mourning jewelry, though not all hair pieces use them.
- Inscriptions and names: Hand-engraved names and dates can be a strong clue, especially when paired with a known family record. The Met’s Tiffany brooch example shows how specific these can be.
- Hairwork that looks like craft, not debris: Authentic hairwork is usually deliberate—braided, woven, or arranged with intention. Loose strands in a locket can still be meaningful, but they don’t automatically indicate “hairwork jewelry.”
And then there is the emotional truth that families rarely say out loud: even if the piece isn’t “museum-authentic,” it can still be real to your family. Sentiment doesn’t require a certificate. What matters most is how you care for it and how it supports your remembering.
The Modern Revival: Hairwork Returns in a Different Kind of World
Hairwork is reappearing now for reasons that have less to do with Victorian fashion and more to do with modern grief. Many families feel a gap between the speed of contemporary life and the slow, physical reality of loss. A tangible keepsake—hair, ashes, handwriting, a pet’s fur—can feel like an anchor.
Some of the revival is cultural, too. Leila’s Hair Museum in Independence, Missouri, spent decades collecting hairwork pieces, and in 2025 it closed with efforts underway to place the collection in other museums, underscoring that hairwork is being recognized again as legitimate material culture rather than a curiosity. Contemporary artists also talk openly about hair as a sustainable fiber and a deeply human material, adapting techniques for people who want memorial jewelry that feels intimate but not antiquated.
What has changed is the ethical frame. Modern families want consent, transparency, and care. They want to know exactly whose hair is being used, how it’s handled, and how it will be protected in the final piece. In other words, today’s families are asking the same question Victorian families asked when they worried about anonymous hair: “Can I trust this process?”
Where Victorian Hair Jewelry Meets Modern Cremation Choices
Hairwork jewelry makes sense as a history lesson, but it also makes sense as a mirror. Today, more families are choosing cremation, which means the “what happens next” decisions often involve tangible keepsakes. According to the National Funeral Directors Association, the U.S. cremation rate is projected to be 63.4% in 2025, and NFDA’s consumer data also highlights how varied families’ preferences are—some people want cremated remains kept at home in an urn, others prefer scattering, and others want interment. CANA similarly reports a U.S. cremation rate of 61.8% in 2024, with projections continuing upward.
In practical terms, that means many families are building memorial “systems,” not single objects. You may have a primary urn, plus a few shareable keepsakes, plus a wearable piece that can travel with you. For some families, hair jewelry fits into that system naturally—especially when hair is available and meaningful. For others, it’s not hair but ashes that become the keepsake material, through cremation jewelry designed to hold a small portion.
If you’re exploring that path, Funeral.com’s Cremation Jewelry collection can help you understand what modern memorial jewelry looks like when it’s engineered for a secure, everyday-wear keepsake. And if you’re still deciding between a wearable keepsake and a home memorial, it often helps to start with the basics: how much you want to keep close, how you want the memorial to feel day-to-day, and whether you expect to travel, move, or share the remains among multiple people.
Planning a Memorial “Set”: Urns, Keepsakes, and Jewelry That Work Together
Victorian hair jewelry rarely tried to do everything at once. It did one job beautifully: it held a small, intimate part of someone’s presence. Modern funeral planning can benefit from the same clarity. When families feel overwhelmed, it’s often because they’re trying to solve emotional, logistical, and family-consensus problems in a single purchase.
A calmer approach is to think in layers. A full-size urn is a “home base.” A keepsake urn is a shareable portion. Jewelry is a close-to-the-body companion. And none of these choices has to be permanent on day one. If you’re considering cremation urns, start with the plan: is the urn staying at home, going to a columbarium niche, being buried, or traveling for scattering later? Funeral.com’s guide How to Choose a Cremation Urn walks through those questions in a grounded way, without assuming you’re “ready” for them emotionally.
From there, you can explore the options that match your plan. Families looking for a primary vessel often begin with cremation urns for ashes. If you’re sharing or creating a smaller memorial, small cremation urns can be a good fit, and keepsake urns offer an even more compact option designed for portioning. When families ask “what’s the best choice?” the honest answer is usually “the one that matches what you’re actually going to do next.”
And if you’re still in the earliest stage—just trying to understand what to do with ashes—Funeral.com’s resource What to Do With Cremation Ashes is the kind of gentle, practical overview that helps families see options without feeling pushed toward one.
Keeping Ashes at Home, Water Burial, and Other Choices That Benefit From a Clear Plan
Hair jewelry is inherently “at home” jewelry; it’s meant to live with you. Many modern families choose a similar home-centered approach after cremation. If keeping ashes at home is part of your plan—whether temporarily or long-term—there are real questions about storage, safety, and boundaries with visitors. Funeral.com’s guide Keeping Cremation Ashes at Home addresses those concerns with the kind of clarity families usually wish they’d had earlier.
Other plans are less about keeping and more about releasing. If your family is considering water burial or scattering at sea, the rules and the urn type matter. Funeral.com’s article Water Burial and Burial at Sea explains what “three nautical miles” means in plain language, and how families plan the moment without turning it into a stressful logistics problem. For families choosing a biodegradable vessel, Biodegradable Water Urns for Ashes can help you understand the difference between float-then-sink and sink-right-away designs.
Pet Hair Jewelry and Pet Urns: When the Loss Is “Small” But the Grief Is Not
Victorian hairwork reminds us of something many pet families already know: grief is not measured by the size of the life you lost. People have always preserved hair as a sign of bond, and today that includes pet hair as well as human hair. Families often want options that feel dignified, not cutesy—something that honors the relationship as real.
If cremation is part of your pet’s story, Funeral.com offers dedicated collections for pet cremation urns and pet urns for ashes, including sculptural options like pet figurine cremation urns that function as memorial art. For families sharing ashes among multiple people—or keeping a portion close while scattering the rest—pet keepsake cremation urns can offer a gentle, practical way to create more than one “place” for love to live.
“How Much Does Cremation Cost?” and the Quiet Value of Knowing Before You Need To
Victorian hair jewelry was labor-intensive, and families understood they were paying for craft as well as meaning. Modern families often face a different reality: cost uncertainty during a time when decision fatigue is already high. If you’re asking how much does cremation cost, you’re not being cold; you’re being responsible. The NFDA reports national median costs for funerals with burial versus funerals with cremation (and those numbers can help you set realistic expectations), while still acknowledging that local pricing varies.
For a plain-language breakdown of typical fees, Funeral.com’s guide How Much Does Cremation Cost in the U.S.? can help you understand what’s usually included, what tends to be optional, and where families commonly get surprised. When you know the cost landscape, you can make memorial choices—an urn, a keepsake set, a piece of cremation jewelry, or even a hairwork commission—with less fear that you’re missing something important.
Choosing Hair Jewelry Today: Ethical Questions That Protect the Meaning
Whether you are preserving an antique piece or commissioning a modern one, the most respectful approach is also the simplest: protect consent, protect clarity, protect the material. If you’re using hair from a living person, consent is straightforward. If you’re using hair from someone who died, it helps to treat it with the same seriousness you would treat ashes or other remains: discuss it as a family, document the decision if needed, and store the hair securely while you decide what to do.
Modern memorial artists often offer a range of methods—braiding, weaving, encapsulating hair behind glass—and families can choose what feels emotionally “right” to wear. Some people want hair visible. Others want it protected behind glass so the piece feels more like traditional jewelry. There isn’t a correct answer, only a comfort threshold. What matters is that the finished piece lets you feel close without feeling burdened.
And if hair jewelry is not the right fit for your family, that does not mean you are abandoning tradition. The underlying need—the need to carry love forward—can also be met through cremation necklaces, a beautifully chosen urn, or a small set of keepsakes that allows siblings or children to share a tangible part of the memorial. Grief rarely wants one perfect object. It wants a plan that can hold you on the hard days and still make sense on the ordinary ones.
A Final Thought: Heirlooms Don’t Have to Be Old to Be Real
Victorian hair jewelry can feel like a relic from another century, but its emotional logic is timeless. It is a way of saying, “You mattered enough that I wanted something I could hold.” Today, families express that same truth in many forms: through heirloom lockets, through cremation urns for ashes placed gently at home, through small cremation urns shared among siblings, through pet urns that honor a companion’s place in the family, and through modern cremation jewelry designed for everyday life.
Whatever you choose, the goal isn’t to copy Victorian customs or to reject them. It’s to recognize what they understood so well: remembrance is not only an idea. Sometimes it needs a physical form—small enough to carry, strong enough to last, and personal enough to feel like love.
