Planning a Shoreline Ceremony Without a Boat: Common Alternatives

If you imagined an “at-sea” goodbye and the logistics fell apart—no boat, no safe weather window, no one able to travel, or simply no desire to be out on open water—you’re not alone. A shoreline can hold meaning without forcing a rushed or risky release. In fact, for many families, the most healing plan is the one that separates two needs that often get tangled together: the need to gather and say goodbye, and the need to decide what happens to the ashes.

That separation matters more than it used to, because cremation is now the majority choice in the U.S. According to the Cremation Association of North America, the U.S. cremation rate was 61.8% in 2024, with continued growth projected. According to the National Funeral Directors Association, the U.S. cremation rate is projected at 63.4% for 2025. More cremation means more families standing on shorelines, holding a container, and asking the same quiet question: “How do we make this feel right?”

The good news is that you have options. You can plan a water-side ceremony that is meaningful today, while keeping your loved one’s remains handled safely and respectfully until the timing and method truly fit. Below are the alternatives families most commonly use when a boat isn’t part of the plan—at least not yet.

• A shoreline memorial gathering now, with an offshore release later when it can be done properly.
• A charter or professional service that handles the offshore release without your family needing to be on the water.
• An inland-water ceremony where permitted, using the right container and confirming local rules.
• A “keep some, scatter some” plan—using keepsakes now, and waiting to release the rest when the timing is right.

Start with what you can do now: a shoreline gathering that doesn’t force the release

Families often think the ceremony depends on the release. In reality, the ceremony depends on presence, language, and a shared moment. A shoreline ceremony can be complete even if the ashes never touch the water that day.

One simple, steady approach is to treat the shoreline gathering as the “memorial,” and treat the release as a separate “disposition” decision that can happen later. That framing lowers pressure immediately. It also makes space for real-world constraints: wind that changes direction, waves that make a pier unsafe, a winter shoreline that’s emotionally perfect but physically harsh, or family members who cannot safely participate around water.

If you want a structure that feels natural without turning the moment into a performance, keep it short and human. Bring a photo, a small bouquet, a candle lantern if allowed, and a container that feels dignified to hold. If you’re still deciding on the long-term plan, many families start by choosing a primary set of cremation urns that can travel well and sit calmly at home between now and whatever comes next. If you want to browse options, start with cremation urns for ashes and then narrow by whether the urn needs to be a home memorial, a travel vessel, or both.

From there, the shoreline ceremony can be as simple as: a short welcome, a memory shared by one or two people, a reading, a quiet minute, and a closing line that gives everyone permission to leave gently. If children are present, give them one clear, safe role—placing a flower near the waterline, holding a photo, or choosing a shell to take home—rather than inviting them to handle anything that could become overwhelming.

Alternative 1: A shoreline gathering now, then an offshore release later

This is the most common “no boat today” plan because it respects both the emotional moment and the practical reality. It also tends to reduce conflict inside families. When you say, “Today is for gathering; the release is a separate step we’ll schedule,” you’re not postponing grief—you’re pacing decisions so they can be made with clearer heads.

If an offshore release later is part of your plan, it helps to know the basic compliance framework. In U.S. ocean waters, the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency explains that burial at sea (including release of cremated human remains) is conducted under a general permit with specific conditions and requires notification afterward. The regulatory text for cremated remains also specifies the “no closer than three nautical miles from land” requirement in 40 CFR 229.1. In plain terms, most shoreline releases are not the same thing as an EPA-compliant burial at sea, simply because shorelines are, by definition, close to shore. That’s why this “gather now, release later” alternative is so useful: you can honor the shoreline while reserving the actual release for a moment that can be done properly.

While you wait, you have a few practical choices for what holds the ashes. Some families choose a full-capacity urn as the “home base,” then use keepsake urns for sharing or for bringing to the shoreline ceremony so the primary urn stays safely at home. If that sounds like your family, browsing keepsake cremation urns for ashes can help you picture how “a portion” actually looks and feels in real life. Another common approach is to use small cremation urns specifically designed for sharing or travel, while keeping the rest secure in the temporary container until the final plan is confirmed. Funeral.com’s small cremation urns for ashes collection describes these as generally under 28 cubic inches, which aligns with the “meaningful share” use case many families need.

If the thought of splitting ashes feels intimidating, you’re not alone. Many families benefit from reading a calm, step-by-step guide before doing anything at home. Start with How to Put Ashes in an Urn (Without a Mess), and if you’re specifically considering keepsakes, Keepsake Urns 101 is written for the exact “we want to do this respectfully” moment families face.

Alternative 2: A charter or unattended scattering service for the offshore release

Not every family wants to be on a boat. Some families cannot safely be on a boat. Some have one person who desperately wants the sea, and several who do not. In those cases, a charter provider or a professional “unattended” scattering service can be a bridge: your family gathers on shore for the memorial, and the provider completes the offshore release later.

What makes this feel steady is documentation. You are not outsourcing grief—you are outsourcing a specialized logistical step. If you go this route, ask questions that help you understand what will happen and what you will receive afterward. It is often easiest to request answers in writing, not because you’re suspicious, but because grief makes it hard to remember details.

• Will the scatter be done at least three nautical miles from land, and will you provide the approximate coordinates?
• What container will be used, and does it avoid plastics or materials that create marine debris?
• Will the service handle the required EPA notification after the burial at sea, or will they provide what you need to file it yourself?
• Can you schedule a specific date window, and what happens if weather forces a reschedule?

The EPA’s burial-at-sea guidance is the clearest baseline for what “compliance” means in U.S. ocean waters, including the note that the general permit requires EPA notification within 30 days of the burial and that pet remains are not covered under that permit. If you want the plain-language version first, Funeral.com’s article Water Burial and Burial at Sea: What “3 Nautical Miles” Means walks families through what those rules mean in practice, before you ever make a phone call.

Alternative 3: Inland-water options where permitted

Sometimes “water” does not have to mean “ocean.” For many families, the meaningful water is a lake near a cabin, a river by a family farm, or a bay where someone spent summers. Inland-water ceremonies can be beautiful, but they are also the area where rules vary the most. The EPA notes that scattering cremated remains in inland waters is not regulated under the federal burial-at-sea general permit, and that states may have requirements or prohibitions for lakes and rivers. That means the burden shifts to local confirmation: the managing agency (state park, reservoir authority, city shoreline department) often matters as much as the state itself.

If an inland-water ceremony is your plan, the most practical next step is to pick the location first and confirm rules second, before choosing a container. If a lake does not permit scattering, you can still hold the shoreline ceremony there and choose a different final disposition later. If scattering is allowed, families often prefer a fully biodegradable approach—especially if they want the moment to align with the idea of returning to nature.

Funeral.com’s biodegradable & eco-friendly urns for ashes collection is a helpful starting point when you want a container designed for nature-forward ceremonies. Even if you do not purchase from that collection, reading the “eco urn types” section can clarify what families mean when they say “water-soluble,” “plantable,” or “scattering tube,” and why those differences matter for a water-side plan.

If you want a broader picture of what a water burial ceremony typically involves (beyond just the rules), Understanding What Happens During a Water Burial Ceremony gives families a gentle walkthrough of the process and the choices that tend to come up.

Alternative 4: Keep the ashes until the timing works, and still honor the water now

There is a quiet truth many families need to hear: it is okay not to be ready. The calendar after a death fills quickly—paperwork, travel, estate tasks, family dynamics—and “we’ll scatter in the spring” often turns into “we’ll figure it out later.” That is not failure. It is grief meeting real life.

If you are holding ashes at home for a while, it helps to make the holding plan intentional. That may mean choosing a primary urn sooner (so the temporary container is not the long-term solution), or it may mean choosing a secure temporary setup and giving yourself permission to revisit the decision when the urgency has faded.

If you are wondering about the practical and legal side of keeping ashes at home, Funeral.com’s guide Keeping Cremation Ashes at Home in the U.S. covers safe storage and the common questions families ask when ashes will remain in the home for months or longer.

For many families, the most emotionally steady version of “keep them until ready” is a split plan: keep a portion in a keepsake, and reserve the rest for the future release. A keepsake can be a small urn on a shelf, a token portion for each sibling, or a piece of cremation jewelry that travels with you. If your family is considering jewelry, start with Cremation Jewelry 101, then browse cremation necklaces if you want to see what styles exist. Many people also appreciate a practical buying guide like Cremation Necklaces and Pendants for Ashes: How They Work, because it answers the questions you may not know to ask until you’re holding the piece in your hand.

If you want ideas for what a shoreline ceremony can include when no release happens, think “symbolic, not substitute.” Families often bring flowers, a letter to read aloud, a small bottle of water from home to pour into the sea, or a stone to hold during the reading and then keep. If you want a wider menu of possibilities, What to Do With Cremation Ashes is designed to help families see that “ashes decisions” can be flexible, layered, and personal.

Choosing containers that match a shoreline plan

When your ceremony is shore-based, the right container is the one that matches what you will actually do—today and later—not what you feel you “should” do. If the ashes will remain at home for a time, prioritize a secure, dignified vessel that can sit peacefully in your space. If the plan includes sharing, travel, or a future release, consider a “system” rather than a single object: a primary urn as the anchor, and one or more smaller containers for portions.

Families who want one place to start often begin with cremation urns for ashes and then narrow by size and use. If you already know the plan involves dividing, exploring keepsake urns and small cremation urns early can reduce conflict later, because it turns “How do we split this?” into a practical, visible choice rather than a vague emotional argument.

If you want a calm framework for choosing based on your plan—home, burial, scattering, or travel—Funeral.com’s guide How to Choose a Cremation Urn That Actually Fits Your Plans starts with scenarios instead of style, which is often exactly what a family needs when the shoreline is part of the story.

If pets are part of the story

Some families plan a shoreline ceremony because the water mattered to a person and a pet—years of walks, a favorite beach, a dog who always swam out too far. If you are honoring both, the gentlest approach is usually to keep plans separate, even if the ceremony is shared. The EPA’s burial-at-sea guidance clarifies that the federal general permit for burial at sea applies to human remains only and does not allow pet remains to be mixed with human remains for authorized burial. That does not mean you cannot honor a pet at the same shoreline gathering. It means you should avoid combining remains for an offshore burial-at-sea process.

If you are making pet choices alongside human choices, browsing pet cremation urns for ashes can help you find a vessel that feels worthy of that bond. Some families prefer figurine memorials that visually reflect a beloved companion; others want a discreet keepsake. If either of those is you, consider pet figurine cremation urns for ashes or pet keepsake cremation urns for ashes. For a practical sizing and personalization guide, Choosing the Right Urn for Pet Ashes helps families match the urn to the pet and the plan.

Costs, simplicity, and the relief of a plan that fits

Even when a shoreline ceremony is simple, the broader picture often includes cost questions—especially if a charter scattering service or travel is involved. If you are sorting out funeral planning decisions and trying to understand what is “included” versus what is separate, it helps to read one clear cost breakdown before you start calling providers. Begin with How Much Does Cremation Cost? and then, if you want line-item clarity, read Itemized Cremation Costs Explained. Families often feel less anxious once they can separate the cremation provider’s professional fees from optional ceremony choices and personal memorial items like urns and jewelry.

That clarity can also help you choose where to spend and where to simplify. Some families spend almost nothing on the shoreline gathering itself, then invest in a primary urn that becomes a steady, daily memorial. Others keep the urn simple and prioritize a future charter scattering because the water is the “must-have.” There is no correct allocation—only the allocation that fits your family’s values and capacity.

You can honor the water without forcing the moment

If you take one thing from this guide, let it be this: you do not have to turn a shoreline gathering into a release to make it real. The ceremony is real because you showed up, because you spoke their name, because you stood together in a place that mattered. The ashes decision can be made with care, on a timeline that respects safety, legality, family dynamics, and emotional readiness.

When you’re ready, you can move from “we gathered” to “we decided.” That decision might involve a future offshore release, an inland-water ceremony, a biodegradable return to nature, or a long-term home memorial anchored by an urn and a few small keepsakes. Whatever you choose, the goal is the same: a plan that feels respectful, manageable, and true.