When an employee returns to work after losing a pet, the grief often arrives quietly first. It shows up in small pauses over email, in a sudden need to step outside after a meeting, in the way their voice tightens when someone asks, “How was your weekend?” It can be tempting for a workplace to treat pet loss as “personal,” meaning private, meaning unspoken. But most managers learn quickly that silence doesn’t make grief disappear—it just makes it lonelier.
Supporting an employee through pet loss doesn’t require grand gestures. What helps most is a culture that treats the human–animal bond as real, the disruption as legitimate, and the practical details as something a person shouldn’t have to navigate alone. For HR teams, this is also where compassion becomes strategy: acknowledging pet grief builds trust, improves retention, and signals that your workplace doesn’t only care about employees when their lives look tidy.
This guide is written for employers and managers—but it also gently helps families understand the memorial choices that often follow, including pet urns, pet urns for ashes, pet cremation urns, cremation jewelry, and the practical realities of keeping ashes at home. The goal is simple: when your staff is hurting, help them feel supported—and help them find next steps that reduce stress instead of adding to it.
Why pet loss hits work so hard
A pet is woven into the daily rhythm of a person’s life: morning routines, commuting patterns, sleeping habits, movement breaks, social contact. When a pet dies, it isn’t only sadness—it’s the collapse of a familiar structure. People may be navigating euthanasia decisions, vet bills, or picking up cremated remains while trying to meet deadlines.
In many workplaces, grief is “recognized” only when there’s a traditional bereavement category. The absence of a formal policy for pet loss can unintentionally send a message: your pain isn’t official. That’s why even simple acknowledgment matters so much. As reporting from WorkLife notes, more employers are actively discussing pet bereavement support as part of culture, benefits, and retention.
There’s also a practical reason pet loss intersects with end-of-life decision-making more often than people realize: cremation has become increasingly common in the U.S., and many families—pet and human alike—are making choices about ashes, memorial items, and long-term plans. According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), the U.S. cremation rate was 60.5% in 2023 and is projected to rise to 81.4% by 2045.
The Cremation Association of North America (CANA) also publishes annual cremation statistics and reporting that reflect how common cremation has become. When cremation is involved, grief can be complicated by a new question employees may not be ready for: what to do with ashes. That’s where workplace compassion can become very practical.
What compassionate support looks like in the first week
The first helpful move is surprisingly small: name the loss without minimizing it. “I’m so sorry—losing a pet is heartbreaking. How can we support you this week?” is often enough to release the pressure employees feel to pretend they’re fine.
From there, support usually works best when it’s flexible. Many companies don’t need a brand-new paid leave category to be kind; they can use existing tools—personal days, flexible scheduling, remote work, shift swaps—and make it clear that it’s okay to use them.
- Offer a day or two of personal leave (or manager-approved discretionary time off)
- Allow remote work temporarily, if the role permits
- Reduce nonessential meetings for a week
- Adjust deadlines or reassign high-stakes tasks briefly
- Ask the employee what level of acknowledgment they want from the team
That last point matters. Some employees want a brief note in a team channel. Others want privacy. Compassion is not exposure.
What not to say (and what to say instead)
Pet loss is a type of grief that people often feel pressured to justify. Avoid phrases like “At least it was just a pet,” or “You can always get another.” Even when well-intended, these comments land as dismissal.
Try language that honors the bond without overstepping: “They were family,” “It makes sense you’re hurting,” “Take the time you need today.” If your workplace already has a standard bereavement framework, the SHRM bereavement leave policy template can help HR teams think through consistent leave practices (even if you adapt the spirit of it for broader definitions of “family” over time).
When workplace support includes practical help with memorial decisions
Here’s the part many employers miss: pet loss often comes with immediate logistical decisions. The employee may be coordinating with a veterinary clinic or crematory, choosing whether to pick up ashes, deciding if they can emotionally handle opening an urn package at home, or wondering how to carry ashes respectfully if they’re traveling.
A compassionate workplace can support these realities without “getting involved” in private matters. The manager doesn’t need details. They just need to normalize that practical tasks are part of grief.
If you have an employee assistance program (EAP), remind the employee it exists—and mention pet loss explicitly, because they may not realize it applies.
This context matters because it shapes what people need: not just time off, but guidance and options for memorialization that feel respectful and manageable.
Helping employees understand urns, keepsakes, and “what happens next” with ashes
Some employees return to work carrying grief that feels invisible. This is where cremation jewelry and keepsakes can be unexpectedly supportive—especially for people who don’t want to talk about their loss at work, but still want a sense of closeness.
For families choosing an urn, clarity reduces stress. A simple explanation helps: a full urn holds most or all ashes; keepsake urns and small cremation urns hold a portion meant for sharing or personal remembrance. For pets, the same logic applies. A family might choose one primary pet cremation urns piece for home, and one or two keepsakes so different household members can grieve in their own way.
If you want to gently point an employee (or their family) toward options without being salesy, you can share a single resource link and let them decide. Funeral.com’s collections are organized in a way that supports that “browse when ready” approach, such as pet urns for ashes, pet figurine cremation urns, and pet keepsake cremation urns.
For employees who feel comforted by something wearable—but want it to be discreet—pet cremation jewelry can be a quiet form of support, similar to cremation necklaces and broader cremation jewelry for any loved one.
And if the employee is struggling with the “how” of it, Funeral.com’s Journal guides are written in plain language for real families, including Cremation Jewelry 101 and Keeping Ashes at Home—both helpful for people who are overwhelmed but need practical next steps.
Keeping ashes at home without feeling “weird” about it
One of the most common emotions after cremation—pet or person—is discomfort about what it means to have ashes in the home. Employees may worry about guests, children, or even whether it’s “allowed.” That uncertainty can add shame to grief.
In reality, keeping ashes at home is a common choice, and the details are mostly about respect and safety: keeping the urn in a stable location, choosing a secure closure, thinking about who has access, and deciding what feels emotionally sustainable long-term. Funeral.com’s guide on keeping ashes at home walks through these realities gently, which is exactly what many families need in the early days.
Pet loss policies that don’t feel cold or bureaucratic
The best policy language reads like it was written by people who have actually loved animals. It shouldn’t be overly clinical, and it shouldn’t force an employee to prove the legitimacy of their grief.
A practical approach is to include pet loss under a broader compassionate leave umbrella—especially if your organization already supports flexible leave for significant personal events. If you don’t have anything formal yet, start with a norm that managers can follow consistently.
Here is sample policy language you can adapt without turning the handbook into a novel: “Employees may use personal days or manager-approved discretionary leave following the death of a pet.” “Managers are encouraged to offer flexible scheduling or remote work when feasible during the first week after a loss.” “Employees may request privacy or, if desired, a brief team acknowledgment.”
These aren’t promises you can’t keep. They’re guardrails that prevent an employee from having to beg for basic care.
Where funeral planning and pet loss unexpectedly overlap
It may seem odd to discuss funeral planning in an article about pet loss—but many employees report that losing a pet brings up other grief. Sometimes it reactivates the memory of a parent’s death. Sometimes it sparks anxiety: “What would my family do if something happened to me?”
This is where an HR professional can gently normalize planning without fear. End-of-life planning isn’t only for “later.” It’s a form of care that removes future stress from the people we love.
When cremation is part of that planning, families often want basic answers: how much does cremation cost, what’s included, and what’s optional. Funeral.com’s guide How Much Does Cremation Cost? breaks down typical ranges and the difference between direct cremation and services—useful for anyone trying to plan with clarity instead of panic.
It also helps to explain that memorial items are flexible. A family can start with a simple urn now and choose additional keepsakes later. Options include cremation urns for ashes for a primary memorial, small cremation urns for shared remembrance, and keepsake urns when multiple family members want something tangible.
For families navigating both pet loss and human loss in the same season (it happens more than people expect), Funeral.com’s How to Choose a Cremation Urn That Fits Your Plans is an especially grounding read because it starts with real-life scenarios: home, burial, travel, sharing.
Scattering, water burial, and the “we’re not ready yet” timeline
Some employees know immediately what they want to do. Others need months. A compassionate workplace respects that grief has a timeline that can’t be rushed.
Families deciding what to do with ashes often land in the middle: keeping some at home, scattering some later, sharing a portion with a family member who lives far away. This blended approach is common enough that it helps to name it out loud.
For people drawn to nature-based rituals, water burial can be a meaningful option in certain contexts—especially with biodegradable products and clear planning. Funeral.com’s Understanding What Happens During a Water Burial Ceremony explains the process step-by-step in a way that’s calming rather than overwhelming.
And for families weighing the emotional tradeoffs between scattering and a permanent home memorial, Funeral.com’s Scattering Ashes vs Keeping an Urn at Home offers a clear, compassionate comparison—especially useful when relatives disagree and the employee feels caught in the middle.
The quiet impact on morale, trust, and retention
When a workplace acknowledges pet loss, employees remember. Not because the company “fixed” grief, but because it didn’t force them to hide it. That creates psychological safety: people feel less alone, less ashamed, and more likely to ask for help before they break.
If you want a single leadership principle to share with managers, it’s this: treat pet loss like a real loss, and let the employee lead the level of disclosure. Your team doesn’t need perfect words; it needs permission to be human.
In a world where cremation is increasingly common—and where families are making more personal choices about remembrance—compassion at work doesn’t end at a sympathy message. Sometimes it looks like an extra day off. Sometimes it looks like letting someone keep their camera off in a meeting. Sometimes it looks like saying, “If you’re handling arrangements or picking up ashes, take the time you need.”
And sometimes it looks like offering a resource link—then stepping back.
