Modern Reliquaries: What They Are Today and Why Some Families Choose “Sacred Object” Memorials

After a cremation, there is often a moment when the practical questions arrive before the emotional ones have even settled. Someone picks up the temporary container from the crematory, sets it down carefully, and realizes the next decision is not paperwork at all—it’s meaning. It’s the quiet, complicated question of what to do with ashes, especially when you want the answer to feel respectful without feeling heavy, and personal without feeling exposed.

That is one reason you may hear the word “reliquary” used again—sometimes in religious contexts, sometimes in art and design, and sometimes in a family’s own language as they search for a container that feels less like an object and more like a relationship. In its modern form, a modern reliquary memorial is often a small, intentionally chosen vessel that holds a tiny keepsake portion—ashes, a lock of hair, a note, a pressed flower, or another memento. Some people call it a reliquary urn. Others call it a sacred keepsake box. The name matters less than the intention: a way to keep closeness, privacy, and reverence in the same place.

This article will explain what a reliquary means today, how it overlaps with keepsake urns and cremation jewelry, and the practical details that help it feel calming rather than stressful—things like closure, labeling, privacy, long-term storage, and how a reliquary can fit into bigger funeral planning decisions.

The reliquary idea: from sacred relics to secular keepsakes

Historically, reliquaries were created to hold relics—objects associated with saints or sacred figures—kept in containers meant to honor and protect what was inside. Even when a family is not religious, that core idea still resonates: the belief that certain things deserve careful keeping, and that the container itself can be part of the honoring.

In modern, secular use, “reliquary” is sometimes borrowed to describe an artful memorial object container—often small, sometimes sculptural, sometimes minimal—chosen because it feels intentional. For some families, it fits their aesthetic as memento mori decor: not “dark,” but honest, grounded, and quietly meaningful. For others, the word simply gives shape to something they already feel: “This is not just storage. This is something we treat with care.”

Because the term carries religious history, tone matters. Many families choose to keep the language simple and respectful—“keepsake,” “memorial vessel,” “small container,” “remembrance box”—and let the ritual or placement provide the reverence. If you do choose the word reliquary, it can help to frame it as a modern, personal practice rather than a claim on any tradition.

Why more families are drawn to small, meaningful containers now

One reason is simply the growth of cremation. According to the Cremation Association of North America, the U.S. cremation rate was 61.8% in 2024 and is projected to continue rising. According to the National Funeral Directors Association, the U.S. cremation rate is projected to be 63.4% in 2025, with longer-term projections continuing upward. As cremation becomes more common, families also develop more varied, personal ways of keeping and honoring remains.

Another reason is that people often want both together: a primary plan for the full cremated remains and a personal, smaller plan for closeness. The NFDA’s statistics also reflect how diverse preferences can be. On the same NFDA statistics page, among people who prefer cremation, substantial shares say they would want cremated remains kept in an urn at home, scattered in a sentimental place, interred in a cemetery, or split among relatives. Those “split among relatives” and “keep at home” preferences are exactly where the modern reliquary concept tends to appear—not as an alternative to everything else, but as a supportive piece of a larger plan.

In other words, a reliquary is often less about novelty and more about realism. When several people are grieving the same person, a single container can feel like it belongs to no one—or like it belongs to everyone and therefore can’t be moved. A keepsake reliquary can be a gentle compromise: one person can keep a small portion close, while the larger plan remains stable and shared.

Reliquary vs. keepsake urn vs. small urn: choosing the right “scale”

In practice, a modern reliquary overlaps with categories you already see in memorial planning: cremation urns, cremation urns for ashes, small cremation urns, and keepsake urns. The difference is usually about capacity, placement, and how public you want the memorial to be.

If your plan includes keeping the full remains at home (at least for a time), you may start by browsing full-size cremation urns for ashes. If your plan is to keep only a portion at home—or to divide a portion among family—then keepsake cremation urns for ashes are often the most straightforward match. If you want something compact but not tiny, small cremation urns for ashes can feel like a comfortable middle ground, especially when you want a discreet memorial that still has presence.

A reliquary, in that landscape, is usually a keepsake-scale choice—but with extra emphasis on symbolism and design. It may look like a small sculpture, a box, a locket-style vessel, or a minimalist container that blends into a bookshelf. It can also be wearable. Many families find that cremation jewelry is, functionally, the most familiar “reliquary” they will ever own: a tiny chamber designed to hold a small portion of remains or another keepsake. If that resonates, exploring cremation jewelry or cremation necklaces can help you decide what “close” looks like day-to-day.

What can go inside a modern reliquary (and what to think through first)

When people picture a reliquary, they often imagine ashes—and many small ashes container designs are created for exactly that. But modern reliquaries can also hold a lock of hair, a dried flower from the service, a piece of fabric, a handwritten note, or a small object that carries the person’s story. The practical question is not only “what belongs,” but also “what will remain stable and respectful over time.”

For ashes, stability usually comes down to a secure closure and a sensible filling process. Families sometimes assume anything described as “sealed” is fully waterproof, but in memorial products, “sealed” often means “secured against normal handling,” not “submersible.” If you are considering jewelry or a very small chamber, it can help to read a filling guide first so you understand how the closure works and what tools are typically used. The Funeral.com Journal’s cremation jewelry 101 guide is a helpful place to start, especially if you are weighing cremation necklaces against a tabletop keepsake.

For non-ash keepsakes, think about longevity. Paper can be protected, but humidity matters. Organic materials (like flowers) can degrade unless properly dried and contained. If the reliquary will be opened and handled repeatedly, choose a design that makes that routine feel safe rather than fragile. Sometimes the most respectful choice is a container that is not opened often, paired with a separate ritual object that can be handled freely.

How to keep the tone respectful without feeling overly formal

Many families are drawn to the “sacred object” idea because it gives permission to treat remembrance as something you can touch—not just something you think about. That can be deeply comforting, especially when grief feels abstract. The key is to let the object support your relationship with the person, not perform it for an audience.

If you want a reliquary that blends into your home, it helps to think in terms of placement rather than display. A small, beautiful object on a shelf can be private even if it is visible. A vessel inside a drawer can still be reverent if you have a simple routine: opening it on anniversaries, reading a letter, lighting a candle nearby, or holding the container for a few quiet minutes. What makes it meaningful is not visibility; it is intention.

Families who like alternative urn ideas often appreciate designs that feel like art rather than “funeral merchandise.” Glass, wood, metal, and ceramic can all feel contemporary and warm. If you want something tactile and grounding, many people gravitate toward wood or metal. If you want light and translucence, artistic glass can feel luminous. In those cases, your main plan may still involve traditional cremation urns, while the reliquary becomes a smaller “touchpoint” you return to as part of living with grief.

Privacy, labeling, and the quiet logistics families rarely talk about

The most practical part of a modern reliquary is also the most overlooked: how you will keep track of what is inside, especially if you are dividing ashes. Even when everyone is aligned today, time has a way of changing households, moving boxes, and family structures. A small container can be misidentified or handled casually by someone who does not understand what it is.

A gentle approach is to keep privacy while still being clear. Some families label discreetly on the underside of a container, or keep a sealed note in a separate family records folder. If multiple keepsakes exist, it can be helpful to document which person has which item, and how much remains where. This is not about being clinical; it is about preventing future distress.

If you are considering keeping ashes at home, safety matters, too. The goal is to make the memorial feel steady, not precarious. The Funeral.com Journal’s guide to keeping ashes at home walks through placement, household dynamics, and the emotional question of whether the arrangement still feels right over time. A reliquary can be part of that plan, but it should not add anxiety. If you find yourself worrying about spills, theft, or frequent handling, it may be better to choose a more secure keepsake vessel—or use a reliquary for a non-ash item, while ashes remain in a more stable container.

How a reliquary can fit into scattering, travel, and water burial plans

Reliquaries often appear when a family is planning multiple steps: keep a portion at home now, scatter later, or split remains among relatives while also interring a portion. This is where thinking in layers can help. A reliquary is rarely the “whole plan.” It is usually a supporting piece that makes the whole plan feel humane.

If part of your plan includes water burial or scattering at sea, it is important to understand the rules that apply to ocean waters. The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency explains that burial at sea of cremated human remains in ocean waters must generally take place at least three nautical miles from land, and the EPA requires notification within 30 days after the event. The EPA also notes that the federal burial-at-sea general permit applies to human remains and does not authorize the burial at sea of pet remains. Those details affect planning in a very practical way, including what kind of container you use and how you structure the ceremony.

If a water ceremony is part of your plan, you may want to explore biodegradable options designed specifically for water and scattering. Funeral.com’s collection of biodegradable & eco-friendly urns for ashes is a starting point for families who want materials aligned with nature. For a deeper explanation of how water-soluble urns float, sink, and dissolve—and how families plan the moment—see the Funeral.com Journal guide on water burial and burial at sea.

When families combine water scattering with a reliquary, the most common approach is to keep a small portion back for the reliquary and use the remaining ashes for the ceremony. This can reduce pressure, especially when grief makes “finality” feel too sharp. It also helps when multiple people want a personal keepsake while still honoring a shared, communal ritual.

When the reliquary is for a pet

The “sacred object” idea often resonates strongly after pet loss, because the relationship is intimate and daily. Many families want something they can keep close without turning their home into a shrine. In pet memorials, a reliquary might hold a small portion of ashes, a lock of fur, a collar tag, or a note—whatever feels like the essence of that bond.

If the keepsake will hold ashes, exploring dedicated pet urns and pet urns for ashes can help you find the right size and style for your home. Funeral.com’s pet cremation urns for ashes collection includes a wide range of designs, and for sculptural memorials that feel like art, pet figurine cremation urns for ashes can be a meaningful direction. If you want something truly small, pet keepsake cremation urns for ashes are designed for tiny portions, and pet cremation jewelry can offer the wearable “reliquary” feeling many people crave.

If you are unsure where to begin, the Funeral.com Journal’s pet urns for ashes guide walks through sizing, materials, and personalization in a way that tends to calm the decision-making process.

Cost, value, and the question families rarely ask out loud

Underneath the symbolism, many families are also trying to stay financially steady. The cost of cremation varies widely by location and by whether services are included. For a national benchmark, the NFDA statistics page reports that the national median cost in 2023 was $6,280 for a funeral with cremation and $8,300 for a funeral with viewing and burial. If you want a practical breakdown of common fees and add-ons, the Funeral.com Journal’s guide to cremation costs breakdown is a helpful companion when you are asking, how much does cremation cost, and trying to compare options calmly.

Where reliquaries fit into cost is usually in the “second layer” of decisions. A family may choose one primary urn first, then add a smaller keepsake later, when the initial shock has softened and the memorial plan feels clearer. If you are trying to keep things simple, it can help to decide: one primary container that supports the long-term plan, and one “close” item that supports your daily grief.

A simple way to decide if a reliquary is right for you

If you are considering a reliquary, it may help to ask three questions that turn symbolism into clarity:

• Do I want this to be private, visible, or wearable—and will that choice feel comforting a year from now?
• Is this reliquary meant to hold ashes, or would it feel better as a container for another keepsake (a note, a flower, a small object) while ashes remain in a more secure urn?
• How does this fit into the larger funeral planning picture—home memorial, cemetery placement, scattering, water burial, or a plan that changes over time?

If you are still deciding what the larger plan is, it can be reassuring to start with guidance that keeps options open. The Funeral.com Journal’s how to choose a cremation urn guide focuses on matching the container to the plan—because the urn is not only a symbol, it is also the tool that makes the plan doable.

And if you are simply trying to breathe and find possibilities, the Funeral.com Journal’s guide on what to do with cremation ashes can help you see a broader menu of choices, including keeping ashes at home, sharing portions with family, and creating rituals that feel gentle rather than forced.

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